BDSM Toys for Beginners: A Guide for Kink-Curious Couples

Although we can all agree that 50 Shades of Gray did more harm than good to the world as a work of art, a few positives came with this esteemed piece of literature. One of those positives is the growing interest in BDSM play.

Indeed, the BDSM community has grown significantly since Mr. Gray's first appearance. While this type of bedroom shenanigans is still surrounded by stigma, more and more couples decide to explore their (literal) depths and boundaries.

If you and your partner want to add some kink into your sex life, the best place to start is by searching for appropriate beginner bondage sex toys.

So, for any curious couple reading these words, are you ready to embark on this kinky journey? If so, let us be your guide.

But first...

What Is BDSM?

Most people have a general idea about what BDSM is (thanks to Fifty Shades), but that idea is often flawed (again, thanks to Fifty Shades). In most people's minds, BDSM - which stands for bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism - has a negative connotation.

Most people automatically associate BDSM play with pain rather than pleasure. And sure, some BDSM practices may seem extreme, but the sheer range of kinky play is massive, and it doesn't only include overly dominant practices.

Even something as trivial as using using anal toys during intercourse or masturbation can be considered kinky play. Perhaps you've already introduced some BDSM practices without even knowing about them, such as soft choking or strap-on play.

Slapping one partner's butt during sex? That can also be considered dominant play, and thus, BDSM.

We think you can see where we're getting with this. BDSM is not something you can categorize that easily. Nipple play, oral sex, anal play, sex toys during intercourse, you name it, can all be classified as BDSM.

That means you don't have to start with extreme bondage play when trying BDSM for the first time.

Indeed, kink-curious beginners have tons of options to get started. And yes, that also means there are tons of kinky sex toys for beginners. Let's talk more about them, shall we?

Types of BDSM Sex Toys for Beginners

In theory, any sex toy can be used in BDSM play. In fact, using dildos, butt plugs, or vibrators can all be a good place to start if you've never tried BDSM before.

For example, if you or your partner have always wanted to try double penetration, using a butt plug or dildo during intercourse can be the answer to your kink. You can also experiment without sex toys by introducing more dominant play, such as soft choking or spanking.

However, if you want to take full advantage of the BDSM experience, introducing bondage toys into your kinky adventures is the best way to do that.

What kind of kinky toys do we have in mind? Let's start with an absolute classic of a BDSM toy...

Cuffs

Cuffs offer a fantastic gateway to a more intense BDSM experience. They are also one of the most popular kinks among curious couples.

It's also one of the most common forms of kinky sex shown in numerous TV shows or movies, where a hero, typically a man, finds himself handcuffed to the bed only to be left alone with his belongings gone (like George Costanza in Seinfeld).

But let's not derive too far from the subject. In real life, wrist cuffs or thigh cuffs can be an excellent start to your bondage journey. Restraint play can provide some highly intense sensations as you give yourself up to another person.

In such a scenario, with your movements restrained, you lose control over your own body, allowing your partner to dominate. Many bondage lovers also add blindfolds into the equation, further enhancing the feeling of excitement.

Another advantage of cuffs is that they come in various shapes, sizes, and materials, enabling couples to experiment. Once again, though, they require total trust and clear communication between the partners. Being restrained without feeling comfortable might not lead to an overly pleasant experience.

Restraint Toys

Wrist cuffs and ankle cuffs aren't the only types of restraint toys you can use. They are best for absolute beginners, but once you're ready to take things to another level, it's time to explore other options. BDSM straps for restraint play are the obvious next step in progression.

So, what else can you use for restraint play?

• Rope:
  Rope bondage is the best second step toward more intense restraint play. It's super versatile and gives partners more control over how they wish to proceed. As for the rope material, the best option would be silk rope, which offers a smoother texture that's more pleasant for the skin. The rope also allows you to adjust how tight the knot should be, ensuring you or your partner won't feel extreme pain during sex (unless they want to, of course).
• Bondage Tape:
  Bondage tape might look intimidating initially, mainly because it looks oddly similar to duct tape. Don't worry, though. They have nothing in common as bondage tape, unlike duct tape, sticks only to itself and not skin or hair. What's excellent about bondage tape is that it gives you many options regarding how and what parts of your body you'd like to restrain. It also provides a more bondage vibe than other options, further enhancing your kinky fantasy experience.
• Bondage Kit:
  If you can't decide what type of restraint toy to pick, you can always opt for a full bondage BDSM kit with all the accessories you need to see what bondage play feels like. Such kits often offer the best value as they already contain several bondage toys for beginners and more experienced BDSM players.

Nipple Clamps

While blindfolds, restraint gear, and ball gags are more about establishing dominance between partners, clamps can stimulate one's body parts by pulling, squeezing, sucking, etc. That can significantly enhance overall pleasure, resulting in more intense orgasms.

As for the best clamps for BDSM beginners, we suggest going for classic nipple clamps. However, adjustable nipple clamps come in various shapes and sizes, and while you might be into nipple play, not all of them can provide you with the sensations you seek.

For example, if you love having your nipples sucked, silicone nipple suckers will provide you with the most intense sensations. If you prefer when a partner squeezes or pulls your nipples, classic press nipple clamps will do the job best.

The best idea is to look around, consider what turns you on, and base your purchase on that. After all, who knows your body better than you?

Whips and Paddles

Last but not least, we present something for impact play enthusiasts. If you love to be spanked during sex, you can enhance the sensations using toys dedicated to this purpose.

However, there are various spanking toys available, and each offers a slightly different sensation, ranging from sensual touch to stingy pain. Again, it all comes down to your preference.

For example, if you enjoy a good spanking during sex, using a whip is the most intense. However, be mindful that using it requires practice. If you're new to such BDSM, a better idea would be to start with a paddle or a slapper.

Also, a word of advice. Be careful when introducing impact play into the bedroom. While it can be extremely intense and pleasurable, it's easy to lose control over how hard you should spank your partner's bare skin. Start gently and establish a safe word.

Collars

Restraining one's breathing and movement plays a significant role in establishing power dynamics in BDSM practices. That is why collars and BDSM are inseparable. A partner wearing one submits to another person, signifying one person's ownership over another.

For people who want to try power play, using a collar with a leash or another type of neck gear is an excellent place to start. Such practices can lead to more intense sensations, opening new ways to experiment with your kinky fantasies.

However, it's essential to ensure the collar isn't too tight. It should only fit snugly against the throat. Be sure you can comfortably fit a finger between a neck and a collar. Going too far can be dangerous, and we think it's safe to assume you don't want to end up in the hospital in your bondage gear still on.

Blindfolds

The simplest way to introduce some kinky fun into your sex life can be something as simple as closing your eyes and letting your partner do the talking.

Going blind for a while during sex can build extreme tension as you let your partner do whatever they want (within the limits, of course).

By using a blindfold, such as our Fifty Shades blindfold, you won't feel the temptation to peek at what your current master is doing, enhancing your sensations as your other senses sharpen, leading to a more intense sexual experience.

However, such a play requires trust and clear communication between partners. If you aren't certain whether you can fully give yourself up to another person, a blindfold won't do its job.

Mouth Gags

Staying in the area of the neck and mouth, it's time to introduce to you the old classic - a mouth ball gag. Oh yes, we bet you've seen plenty of them in TV shows or movies.

Like handcuffs, they are probably the most mocked BDSM toy around. And like in the handcuff's case, that representation has nothing to do with reality.

The truth is that mouth ball gags can take your sexual experience to the next level, especially if you or your partner have oral fixations. Again, it's all about establishing dominance.

A person wearing the gag gives up their ability to communicate with their partner verbally, which, for people with such fixations, is a massive turn-on.

Another reason why people use gag balls is that they give them more control than restraint toys, such as bondage tape or cuffs. However, if you intend to introduce ball gags into your play, be sure to establish a non-verbal safe word.

BDSM Toys for Beginners: Buying Guide

Okay, so we've covered the options you have. Any initial thoughts? Perhaps you have already noted toys you want to try? Yes? No? Doesn't matter.

We get that buying a BDSM toy for your kinky fantasies can be a struggle. Therefore, we decided to provide several tips on which toy might best suit your dirty needs.

So, without further ado, what should you consider when shopping for BDSM sex toys?

Start by thinking about your needs. What are your kinks and fantasies? What turns you on? Do you like to be dominated, or do you want to dominate? Then, talk to your partner. After all, you'll both be involved in your kinky antics.

For instance, if you like nipple stimulation and your partner has an oral fixation, consider buying yourself nipple clamps and a collar for your partner. Sex whips are good for flogging and we have plenty of beginner friendly spanking toys and paddles.

If, for instance, you wish to start with impact play but are afraid to leave marks, don't go with a whip. A flogger might be a better choice for beginners.

Simply put, think about what kind of BDSM toys best suit your kinks. Then, narrow down the search to the best toys for beginners. You can also opt for a beginner's bondage kit containing all the essential BDSM sex toys for your BDSM journey.

Best Beginner BDSM Sex Toys: Our Top Choices

Alright, we're slowly getting to the end of our guide. However, before we wrap things up, we want to leave you with, what we believe, are our top toy choices for BDSM beginners.

And yes, you can find all these toys at The Adult Toy Shop (we wouldn't recommend other guys' toys, would we?). Here’s what we'd recommend you get:

Are You Ready to Get Kinky?

And now that's a wrap! Are you ready to set sail and head out into the unknown waters of BDSM play? If so, it's time to equip yourself with the right tools for a safe and exciting journey. We hope our guide helps you achieve that.

As you can see, there are numerous BDSM toys to choose from, and each offers different sensations and suits various kinks. Therefore, if you aren't sure where to start, think about your fantasies and turn-ons. Discuss the matter with your partner and browse through the rich collection of sex toys available.

The reality is that in the right hands, any sex toy can become a great tool in one's BDSM antics. Don't limit yourself just to cuffs or blindfolds. Treat BDSM as an invitation to explore your dirtiest fantasies. Just be sure you and your partner are on the same page.

After all, good sex can only be called that way if all parties enjoy it. You don't have to be a certified sex therapist to know that.