How to Use Anal Toys – The Essential Beginners Guide
Anal play is a great way to boost your sexual pleasure and make orgasms feel better. Why? The anus is jam-packed with highly sensitive nerve ending that feel good when stimulated. Both men and women benefit from anal stimulation and today you'll learn just how to do that!
Table of Contents
Everyone benefits from using anal toys during foreplay, solo masturbation or penetrative sex. Today you'll learn how to use anal toys to maximize your sexual pleasure along with a few important Sexpert tips and advice on using an anal sex toy for the first time safely for your ultimate enjoyment.
What is an Anal Toy?
An anal toy is a sex toy designed to be inserted into the anus for sexual pleasure. It applies pressure around the anal sphincter and provides a feeling of fullness inside the rectum which stimulates sensitive nerve endings to increase stimulation during masturbation or penetrative sex.
There are several different types of anal toys and the designs will vary greatly. If you are a beginner anal toy user, I urge you to have a look at my anal toy guide to learn about the different varieties so you can find the one you like best and begin with an anal starter.
Sure we all know about butt plugs, prostate toys for men and anal beads, but there are a few other categories that you may find interesting such as anal training toys, dildos and vibrating butt plugs. Some are for internal stimulation and others can be used externally on the perineum.
The Importance of Anal Lube
Before I divulge all the details on ways to properly and comfortably enjoy anal play, I must stress the importance of anal lube. It is absolutely essential for anal sex and any back door activity that you and your lover plan on engaging in – and here's why:
The anus does not self-lubricate like the vagina does, so it stays dry. The tissue inside the rectum is delicate and can tear if you try to stuff a butt plug that's way to big that your current experience level.
If you insert an anal toy for the very first time without proper anal lubrication, you'll feel an uncomfortable pulling sensation on the anal sphincter and it just won't be fun. If you're preparing for anal sex, you'll certainly need to train the anus with a butt plug, anal dildo and plenty of anal lubricant.
You need to relax the sphincter and not jam anything in – after all, it is technically a one-way valve. Slathering on a generous dollop of water-based anal lube is the most important piece of advice I can give you before shopping for butt toys online.
How to Choose your First Anal Toy
Anal toy size matters – especially if you're a butthole virgin starting out for the first time. Here are a few tips on how to pick the best anal toy for beginners:
- Select a small anal toy – Anything thin and short will be a good intro to anal play. Girth matters more than length – so seek a small wand or toy with a diameter less than 1 inch across.
- Seek a thin butt plug stem – A typical butt plug will rest in place with the sphincter at the stem, so a thin stem will limit stretching sensation. Stretching feels good, (also known as anal training sets) but this is a slow process and you'll need a thin stem to start.
- Consider anal beads – Beginner anal beads have the smallest diameter right at the tip so insertion is easiest out of all types of anal toys. The graduated size feels great and isn't too overbearing for beginners.
- Enhance pleasure with vibration – Vibrating anal toys are a seriously exiting way to improve pleasure. The tingling sensation back there is simply unparalleled.
- Anal beads vs butt plug - Which one to choose? Compare the differences between anal beads and butt plugs to make a confident decision on which anal toy is best for you.
Best Anal Toy Materials
What are anal toys made of? You'll typically find the best butt toys made of the following materials, listed below in order of popularity:
- TPE & TPE – These are two types of elastomers that feel like a combination of silicone and jelly. Manufacturers are now making these without pthalates, so all our anal toys for sale are body-safe and many are even lab-certified non toxic. (FYI - If it wasn't safe – The Adult Toy Shop simply wouldn't sell it.)
- Silicone – Silicone can be soft or hard, no two silicone anal toys are the same so make sure to watch our video demos and read the product descriptions to see if it's soft or firm. Silicone is non-porous and even though some sources say you can boil them to sanitize, we don't recommend that – it is unnecessary and could compromise the integrity of the toy.
- Metal – Stainless steel or aluminum butt plugs are perfect for temperature play – put the toy in your freezer or dip it in hot water for a few minutes before insertion for a chilling sensation of hot or cold. Metal is more durable than any other material and will last a lifetime.
- Glass – Similar to metal, glass butt plugs are ideal for temperature play. Another benefit of glass anal toys is they feel heavy and the extra weight back there feels erotically exciting. Glass can't shatter – it is made of Borosilicate which is the same as Pyrex bake-ware.
Tease Vibrating Butt Plug - $32
Slippery and smooth vibrating butt plug with tapered shaft is ideal for beginners.
Flexer Vibrating Anal Beads - $37
Powerful vibrating silicone anal bead vibrator for adventurous anal play.
How to Use Anal Sex Toys
So now that you know a bit more about anal toys, it's time to learn how to properly use them:
- Lubricate the insertable portion of the anal toy.
- Lubricate around your anus in a circular motion with your finger, then your finger in an inch or so to apply lube inside.
- Line up the toy with your anus, then exhale (breathing out relaxes the sphincter).
- Slowly push the toy in with a gentle twisting motion.
- One it's inserted a couple inches, move it in and out to evenly distribute lube.
Since there are many different varieties of anal toys, continuing the tutorial with blanket instructions just won't do so here's step by step instructions on how to proceed with anal play according to type:
How to Use a Butt Plug
A butt plug feels tingly, the stationary erotic pressure is constant and never changes. As such, the best time to use a butt plug is during penetrative sex or masturbation. Some people even wear them all day long since the anchor based base stays hidden discreetly in your underwear and pants.
To insert a butt plug, line up the curved or T-shaped base with your butt crack and push it in until it rests in place. The natural squeezing of your ass cheeks will prevent it from falling out.
Pro Tip: The point of a butt plug is to enhance sexual pleasure by remaining in place, so don't move it around. If you want a toy to move back there, consider a thrusting anal dildo or vibrator instead.
How to Use Anal Beads
Anal beads work by creating a “thumping” sensation when you rip them out. It's the complete opposite of a butt plug – those stay in place, anal beads are pulled at the onset of orgasm.
Check out my full anal beads tutorial here, but to start here's the quick & dirty instructions:
- Push the beads one at a time into the anus with your finger.
- Only insert as many as you feel comfortable – they don't need to go too deep.
- Enjoy penetrative sex or masturbation (with sex toys, ideally!)
- Right at the moment you feel your groin clenching signaling an orgasm, grab the ring and pull out the beads slowly but firmly.
How to Use Prostate Toys & Massagers
Prostate stimulators for men will have a forward facing angle or curve that rubes the P-spot. A prostate dildo can be held and thrust in and out by either you or your lover as part of kinky and exploratory anal play.
A prostate plug will remain stationary just like a butt plug. Use a prostate massager in a slow and rhythmic rocking motion – hence the namesake “massager” because that's literally what you do. This is also known a prostate milking.
- To find the prostate gland, insert the massager about 3 inches inside the anus.
- Be sure the curved part of the shaft faces the front of your body.
- Grab the base of the toy and move in in a rhythmic “come here” motion.
- Keep doing this until you feel a slight sensation that you need to urinate signaling a prostate orgasm is on its way!
How to Use Anal Dildos & Vibrators
Anal dildos are to be probed – poke, jiggle, rock and thrust it in and out just like you'd handle a vaginal dildo. Vibrating anal toys are essentially the same but with vibration, obviously. Most people enjoy the slow moving probing motion, but you'll need LOTS of lube for a slick and sexy glide.
Vibrating butt plugs are to be left stationary, and we advise that you set it in place before activating the motor otherwise the reverberation might mask the exact location, and you want the stem to be through the sphincter so it won't fall out.
- Apply lube inside the rectum with a lube launcher tube.
- Slowly insert the dildo shaft with a twisting motion.
- Move it in and out during insertion to spread lube evenly around.
- Since most anal vibrators & dildos do not have an anchor base, they might fall out as soon as you let go – so be sure to keep a hand close at all times.
- Activate vibration once the toy has been fully inserted.
Pro Tip: Since the anal dildo reaches deeper compared to other anal toys, you may benefit from applying lube with a lube shooter syringe which is a finger-thin plunger tube that enables deep and thorough lube application inside the rectum.
Anal Training & Preparing for Anal Sex
Anal play feels great – but you have to train the anus to be accustomed to bigger girths. Check out my extended resources and tips on anal training and also ways to prepare for anal sex.
- Choosing the right size anal toy should be fun and exciting, not stressful. Even though you may find big anal toys appealing at first, we highly suggest starting out with small anal toys first.
- Couples anal toys are a great way to experiment together. We have several options for his and hers butt plugs that make anal play more interactive with your lover.
- Anal training starter kits are the best way to advance your experience level quickly. These assortments include staggered sizes of the same thing so you can gradually move up in girth and/or length in a controlled way.
Cleaning & Storing Anal Toys
Sex toy sanitation is essential for hygienic reasons, and when it comes to fecal matter from butt stuff, sex toy cleaning takes on a a whole new level of importance. Here are the steps to clean anal toys:
- After removal, avoid touching the insertable part and rinse the toy under hot tap water.
- Spray sex toy cleaner or antibacterial soap and lather it well with your hand.
- Avoid getting the battery compartment wet if your vibrator is not waterproof.
- Thoroughly rinse the toy under hot tap water.
- Leave on your countertop overnight to dry.
- Store it in the original clamshell package or box, or wrap individually in a lint-free microfiber cloth.
Pro Tip: If you use silicone based anal lube, you'll need an anal cleaner douche to properly remove the lube since silicone isn't water soluble and can linger in the rectum until your next bowel movement. Additionally, people like douching before anal sex as it removes any impurities and unpleasant fecal matter scents that can plague your otherwise enjoyable sex life.
Back Door Fun Awaits!
Thanks for tagging along in my anal toy guide today! I hope you find the information useful and feel more educated and confident on what anal toy for beginners will be best for you and how to use it.
My decades of real-world experience working hands-on with customers in sex shops has given me the competitive advantage of knowing what types of anal toys newbies love the most and preferences between men and women too.
No two people are the same, just as no two anal sex toys are the same so I implore you to experiment, try a few different styles and invite your lover to partake in the fun to see which most appeals to you. Happy shopping!